Classy Black Women

Truth be told, Azealia Banks told no lies in her recent rant on black men who don't protect her, white men who use her and some things in between. That is the reality faced by most American black women, though most of us don't want to admit it out loud for fear of "offending" *them*.

In a world where everyone is so quick to write someone off for making contrary remarks on a social networking site, I still maintain clarity. I also have little to no concern for potentially "offending" someone when they are posing a threat to the well-being of women.

I just read a story about a young black girl named Marcie Gerald who was violently sexually assaulted by a black man on the street in Chicago and eventually killed herself due to the trauma. It made me cry. She took pills and then laid down next to her mother to die. The animal who attacked her got eight years, whereas drug charges often get 10-20 or more. 

The reality of the situation is that about 3 out of 5 black girls are sexually molested before they become adults and black women are much more likely to be sexually assaulted, abused or killed by the men they date (mostly black men) than other women. There is some major PTSD happening among black women and girls -- not just in America, but also in African countries like Nigeria. So Azealia is right about black women and girls not being properly protected. 

How many years would that perpetrator have gotten if he attacked a 14 year old white girl?

I'm surprised at the number of black women who have dismissed Azealia despite the fact that many of them have probably gone through the same types of life challenges. Growing up without a father, probably a disturbed childhood that was likely rife with abuse. It must be Stockholm Syndrome -- they have been so conditioned to protect black men that they can't advocate for themselves. We write people like Azealia off as "crazy" when it's obvious to anyone with good sense that she's lashing out publicly due to something that happened to her.

She was vilified by both black men and black women on Twitter recently for having an argument with rapper Wale. But SHE didn't go out and seek him -- HE initially challenged her after she made a few valid comments about black men not being protectors of black women. He patronized her, saying that "all women" need to be put on a pedestal. He told her that black men don't defend black women because they're somehow afraid of black women, confirming her point. If he really cared about her and talking things out, he would have called her on the phone instead of making a display on social media. Yet, as is the case with many arguments, the woman comes out looking like the only "crazy" one with problems.

I don't excuse Azealia's harsh words and approach (calling people the n- word is unacceptable), because clearly she has some serious issues that she must address with a professional or loved one. I sincerely hope she talks to someone who really cares about her and those issues. But I do understand where she's coming from. I get it. Black women are often caught in a tough spot where they feel abused, unprotected and unloved on one end, while being villainized, misunderstood and used on the other end. And it's very frustrating. And it can cause you to lash out in weird ways.

More understanding is needed  here instead of attacks and snap judgments.

Black women, please take care of yourselves. Put yourself first.

-CBL


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Being a fan of someone is normal, but there is something dangerous when we elevate a mere mortal to the status of a "God."

It happens every few years or so, sometimes more frequently. Beyonce releases a song or video and black women collectively lose their minds. It's quite a sight to witness as someone who's a casual listener of her music.

I think that Beyonce is very talented at singing and dancing, but no more so than any other major entertainer of the 20th or 21st century. But for some reason, black women seem hell bent on elevating her to the status of a God; an untouchable.

These black women, and to a much lesser degree black men, are now officially worshipping this woman and holding her to a God-like status. They don't even talk about and defend GOD this much. It's a disturbing sight to behold -- am I the only one who notices the dysfunction in this? I get low self-esteem vibes when anyone spends more time uplifting a celebrity than they do focusing on themselves. 

And it's not just the fringes of black women who are doing this. It is women that we're supposed to look up to, including Michelle Obama (who made a point to mention in an interview that she hopes Beyonce likes what she's wearing) and well-read cultural critics who work for black magazines. These are people who we are SUPPOSED to respect, look up to and look to for answers, acting like pimply-faced teenaged fans. 

It's gotten to the point where you can't even make a contrary remark about this woman (yes, she's still just a WOMAN who happens to have a talent for singing and dancing) without someone trying to jump down your throat.

I saw a post from a black man who took a picture of his young dark-skinned black daughter watching the Beyonce performance. He commented that "this is so important" for her to see. Really? You want your daughter to grow up aspiring to be one of Beyonce's backup singers? Check the imagery in the photo -- here's the one light skinned woman with a long blonde weave leading a "pack" of militant dark skinned woman with Afros. Do you want your daughter to be a follower, a "stan" or a leader? Or do you want your daughter to aspire to look like Beyonce? Because I can guarantee you that no one really cares about the Afro wearing black women in the background in the grand scheme of things -- they are merely props.

She's a Business, Man
I wonder if anyone else with some good sense has noticed that Beyonce is a master at collecting other people's money. She's not in this to support movements (shout out to Black Lives Matter) -- she's in this for two main reasons a) to get ALL the attention like most celebrity narcissists and b) to collect all your coins. She and her people are very strategic about what they do. They've hit the jackpot getting Superbowl attention because it's right around tax time when a lot of people are "hood rich." By May they will be begging and borrowing again after spending all of their money on meaningless things -- including Beyonce concert tickets and Red Lobster meals for their men who are "fucking them right." Beyonce and Jay Z will be many tens of millions of dollars richer, living in their comfy, protected fantasy world that most of their fans will never get to experience.

Do you think that Beyonce would do any of this if it didn't mean she'd be collecting many millions of your dollars? There's nothing wrong with getting money, I definitely encourage it! But when black women are holding this woman up as a cultural ICON, a GOD of black women who is trying to lead us to salvation, a reminder is needed. She is, first and foremost, a BUSINESS woman who is a master of propaganda, imagery and transferring your $$ into her bank account by any means necessary. Her husband as well. 

Yes, Some White People Are Annoying But Some of You Are You're Acting Like Them...
It is very annoying to read the predictable commentary from white people who say "why weren't we included in the performance, racism" and "well, Beyonce hates the police." But there is a lesson to learn from them -- these are people who are completely brainwashed in their ideology. Everything is a fight to defend their ideology, the police (no matter what they do) and by default white supremacy. They don't think critically. These are the Trump supporters who hold onto every word he says like it's gospel. I don't know how it happened, but he successfully used propaganda to elevate himself to a God-like status with these brainwashed people. It's almost cult-like.

Don't be like these weird people -- please don't get so caught up in the ideology of "standom" for celebrities that you can't think critically anymore. It's dangerous.
 
There's an actual psychological diagnosis called Celebrity Worship Syndrome (CWS) and I think an inordinate number of black women have the mild or moderate form of this disorder when it comes to Beyonce, Rihanna and Nicki Minaj. It's an OBSESSIVE ADDICTIVE disorder -- this is real y'all. Psychologists say that it's a replacement for real healthy relationships. Read more about CWS here --- > http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-176598/Do-worship-celebs.html

Can Anybody Hear Me
I stopped posting on this blog because I don't think anyone really "hears me," even though when I check the statistics I actually do have a good number of readers. My last post was supposed to be my last, but I'm posting this today because I feel it REALLY REALLY needs to be said, not by a white critic at a magazine or white feminist, but by someone who understands the struggles and complications of black womanhood. Someone who has been in the trenches, demanding respect and acknowledgement for black women for years. Someone who is concerned for the mental health and future of black women and girls.

I'm posting this because even if no one "hears" me today, at least I spoke up and said something. I think a lot of young black women are going to wake up one day and regret the amount of time and cash they wasted on celebrities, and posting hour after hour on social media.

I've been a black woman for over 30 years, so one thing you definitely won't tell me is who I should look up to, "worship" or regard as a black woman. I don't look up to Beyonce, or any of these modern day narcissistic celebrities that fight for the limelight, and anyone who doesn't like that will have to deal.

On that same note, I clearly don't have the right to tell you how to be a black woman. I would just ask that you think your way critically through life. Love who you want, be a fan of who you like, but please don't get completely brainwashed into becoming a lock stepper who so willingly elevates a HIGHLY FLAWED human being (like you and me) to a God-like status. 

Love CBL




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